NDNVC – Neurodiverse NVC

This post was made possible with the skilled accompaniment of many people within the UK NVC community, most noteably Ceri Buckmaster

Background

Autism And CNVC Logos - infinity symbols

Have you noticed how the autism logo and the NVC logo are similar? As it happens the happy happenstance echoes a deep and multifaceted connection between NVC and neurodiversity. Perhaps you also see a higher proportion of neurodiverse people participating in NVC courses than might be expected in a random population sample. Perhaps like me you are curious.

I was also curious around how my experience of NVC 'cured' my autism! No – of course it didn't 'cure' me! Yet I realised that when in NVC community I found that I was no longer self advocating, which is a considered decision to 'out' oneself by sharing an autistic identity in service of requesting accommodations. Since I had learnt that self advocacy was usually helpful I was in the habit of stopping conversations in neurotypical situations at the point at which I had become overwhelmed and waving the metaphorical 'autism' flag or showing a not so metaphorical autism card.

Furthermore, as my NVC practise developed, I found I was more and more in choice around the kinds of 'autistic behaviours' that are normatively pathologised (e.g. frustration and anger). These are the kinds of topics that I will be writing about on this blog, and I would welcome discourse, of course.

The Invitation

For now, I want to invite people who identify as Neurodiverse to join me in creating, in formenting(!) an NDNVC community. I would love it if this community met these needs:

In explanation of the last point, there are a few ways in which NDNVC might contribute to NVC community at large.

Over the years I have been asked by several Certified Trainers to support them to make their course more accessible to autistic people. Whilst I am happy to alert them as to how the courses might be organised to better support me, and I might also be able to guess at what might support others, I am not confident that I can speak for others. A team with multiple views can better support such requests. Through this, perhaps we might offer some kind of supportive expertise to those NVC trainers who wish their work to become (even) more autistic friendly.

NDNVC might also offer itself as an interface between ND and NVC communities. For various reasons NVC is a contested and emotive subject in some ND communities. I would like to offer space to support difficult experiences many ND people have had, especially when those experiences are to do with NVC. I am curious around the how the work of Sarah Peyton might relate to peoples experience of alexithymia, or how NVC in general might sit with those of us who sense things differently.

I would love it if this space was shared with all participants of all foundations so that those who may identify as ND but not be 'out' might access it in safety.

NDNVC as widening inclusion within NVC

At this time of cultural reflection and a widening of inclusion, in listening to the stories from BIPOC NVC practioners, I had a sense that there were some similarities to my own challenges accessing NVC Certification. Whilst I am active in seeking to deconstruct my colonised self in order to offer my allyship to the global majority, my experience as an autie gives some insight into 'othering', exclusion from cultural structures and internalised oppressive or limiting given identities. I am curious around whether ideas around intersectionality will support this widening of inclusion and therefore when oour BIPOC peers have a sufficient sense of being heard and welcome, then perhaps an invite might be extended to non normative neurologies (and genders) too.

Why create something new?

Q. Why not just set up a group on the usual social media?
A. I try to avoid things like Facebook, I find it addictive, as it was indeed designed to be (see Nir Eyal's book Hooked).

Q. Why not join one of the plethora of available autism groups?
A. See above and I have explored and really loved many of those communities and spaces, I do not think that there are any spaces that are just for those NVC practitioners who identify as ND. I want to practise NVC in ND community! Furthermore, my IT needs are not well met by the available communities or the common social media platforms. These needs are:

Join me!

with warmth and love

~em~